|
| People have been asking me lately if I've been loosing weight. I am pretty sure that I have not lost any, but it leads me to beleive the horrible conviction that I would have been fatter than I am now. I've always had body image problems, but everyone that asks me is making me even more paranoid. I'm not sure if that makes sense, but I want to diet. Anyone care to suffer along with me?
Allergies are killing me. Moldy, dusty movies are waging war on my lungs. I want to vacumm it all out. Or get a new set of lungs. Whichever option is available first.
Is anyone else having problems making calls out? Cingular, you bastard. Too bad you have some nice phones and I signed up with you years ago and can't bear to leave you. Bastard.
You know what sounds good? A margarita, a cheesy romance flick, and 65 degree room temp. Oooohh.. and mochoa almond fudge.
Yea, this diet thing isn't going to work out.... crap. | | |
| Ok, after I finally got everything off my chest, I feel an extremely whole lot better =) sorry for the temp. drama queen mode.
Anyway, I had a humbling day spent with my mom. I needed a day with just her. We had lunch with her mother, and I saw how much I was becoming like that horrid lady, so I quickly shrugged everything off as a short breakdown and left it at that. I'm cured for the moment *confetti* =)
Coffee, anyone? I know that I need contact with other people. And their opinion on clothes. How come nothing seems to look that appealing in stores these days? I don't have the legs for shorts and I don't want to look like a porn star in the shirts that are "fashionable." I feel like such an old lady looking at clothes and cringing.
I want to go somewhere this summer with people. Just a trip to the City, as lame as that may sound to the locals. I want to go museum-hopping- they are so fascinating and captivating. Or check out some art shows, though I am not too familiar with them yet. I hope that this summer is not going to be as lame as I have thought it may turn out to be.
I feel antsy now that I don't have any school work to do. It's weird not taking any summer classes, I feel like a schlub. | | |
| I wish that I had friends. When shit hits the fan, I stand there and oogle at it. I stare until my eyes hurt. My theory is that if you think on it enough, everything will disappear that you hate. If I believe that it never happened for long enough, it actually never happened.
I think that I'm depressed. Horribly. I try to pretend that I'm not in this bind, but it always seems to slap me when I least expect it. "Being half dead wasn't what I planned to be/Now I'm ready to be free." I hope that quote can apply to me at least.
It's friday night, and I'm alone. Everyone is around me, but I'm alone. | | |
| I'm taking a month off of work! Omg, my boss is the greatest boss ever. I feel as if a whole world has been shifted off my back and I am free to *shock* live and breathe for awhile.
School is going ok. A HORRIBLE HORRIBLE night the other day, but with sufficient sleep last night, i think that my body is slowly recooperating. I could not have done it without the bestest boyfriend in the world 
Is it just me, or is it totally bizarre to find out that someone I used to go to high school with is now an escort? I'm not sure to feel bad, disgusted, or just plain sad for her. Horrible, yet amazing, news.
It's hard to come to terms that I'm a passive aggressive. I'm just admitting it now, but, ouch, it burns. Am I really that horrible of a person?
Maybe I should just hold back and see what would come around if I don't open my completely liberal mouth. I vomit too much jargon. Someone, ANYONE, tell me to shut up when I need to shut up.
I'm in a weird mood. I'm mad, and happy, all at once. I would really love to get away for the weekend, but it's mother's day weekend. And the money factor. Just a night, though! I think that the snow would be a perfect destination. | | |
| - all that i got its kind of like running away from something you're curious about. then, when you look back to see how it is going, you run straight into a tree.
you can't really win with some circumstances.
i feel horribly about missing a hangout with some high school friends. i have a lot of reasons why i didnt, but i know that they would all be horribly misunderstood. i'm officially the bitch of the ball.
work is slowing down bc its getting hot and ppl are going back to school. im not sure what i'm still doing there; its crazy as hell. but i would hate not to work with christian.
im scared. i dont know if its paranoia, but im scared. i dont want some things to change, but i know that they will. i want to always be two places as once and i want to be able to take care of everything. i think to highly of myself sometimes, then think more on it and realize im the scum of the earth. im perfectly unperfect.
daylight savings blows and is going to screwup my schedules. how horrible that i live scheduled hour by hour. | | |
|
|
